Sunday, August 24, 2008

Vicodin

I'm an extremely selfish person. I am also on drugs. I contemplate the appropriateness of this post. But my inhibitions are less and dropping. I wish some of you could know me now. I wish you could see this. And I wish that others didn't have to. I wish I knew what to do with my self. I wish I could fly. I wish that I could know the person I will someday marry and I could just be in this whatever state of drugged up bliss and rest silently upon his shoulder. I wish I could sing everyday with the passion of Dave Barnes who is absolutely beautiful to me. I have some sense to delete most of whatever I just wrote but also have sense enough to know that you are getting some sort of mild joy at reading this and that those of you who do read this won't hold it against me forever. I can't believe I'm going to post this. I can't believe that you actually read this garbage. I can't believe that i started this post the way I did, and I can't believe that i waste my time like this. I can't believe they expect me to teach tomorrow. Yes, they actually entrust me with children.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

No such thing

There is no such thing as the socially competent. I heard a friend describe a stranger as socially awkward. I saw what he meant, but I also realize my own social failures. And then I started to see his and everyone's. One person makes spastic movements, another covers up what's really on their mind, another shuts down and closes people out. I've done all of these things.

Many of you have heard me say this in the past: awkwardness loves company. I'm awkward and so are you, let's acknowledge it, embrace it and have some awkward communion.